Saturday, August 30, 2014

Low Carb and Gluten Free Salad


Low Carb and Gluten Free Salad

A plate full of chopped up bacon.

Semi Truck and Trainer Made Out of Hay Bails


Semi Truck and Trainer Made Out of Hay Bails Sitting In a Field

The truck is a long nose and long cab truck.  The trailer is several round bails up on their side and pressed against each other to look like a small liquid transport trailer or a trailer hauling small spools of metal or something heavy.

Friday, August 29, 2014

Easy Chair On The Road


Easy Chair On The Road

An old guy with a comfy chair and foot rest mounted on the back of an over sized scooter.  It appears that there is a TV mounted on the front of the scooter.

Tired of Being Fat and Ugly


Tired of Being Fat and Ugly

Buy a bike and just be ugly.

I Shoot People (And Sometimes Cut Off Their Head)


I Shoot People (And Sometimes Cut Off Their Head)

A black T-Shirt with the picture of a camera drawn on the front of it.

Outdoor Porch Bed


Outdoor Porch Bed

The Man In The Mirror


The Man In The Mirror

A beggar on the street holding a mirror in front of his face.  A man has stopped in front of him looking in the mirror, while reaching in his pocket.

Ladies, Please


Ladies, Please

Be respectful and Put The Seat Up When Finished
-Sincerely Men

This is the dumbest battle.  Everyone put the lid down.  It is ridiculous to leave an huge bowl of water wide open where people are constantly picking up, reaching for, and carrying things around and over the top of it.

Additionally, if this is causing such a problem between you and your loved one, then just put the lid down.  Then you are both equally inconvenienced and you are making a choice that actually makes some sense rather than just because you both are too lazy.

A Mini Mega Ice Cream Cone On Top Of And Inside Of A Mega Ice Cream Cone


A Mini Mega Ice Cream Cone On Top Of  And Inside Of A Mega Ice Cream Cone

To Impress People They Don't Like


To Impress People They Don't Like

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

I Said You're The Good Kind Of Fat!


I Said You're The Good Kind Of Fat!

An avocado in two halves as if one half is a husband and one half is a wife.  The side with the pit is walking away and the other is calling to it.

Children Must Always Wear A Seat Belt


Children Must Always Wear A Seat Belt

Except if you put 50 of them in one vehicle.

You Lost Your Phone And It's On Silent?


You Lost Your Phone And It's On Silent?

Too bad.  If you liked it, you shoulda put a ring on it.

If You Could Write A Note To Your Younger Self


If You Could Write A Note To Your Younger Self

What would you say in only two words.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

I Like To Hangout With People That Make Me Forget To Look At My Phone


I Like To Hangout With People That Make Me Forget To Look At My Phone

Every Bite You Take, I'll Be Watching You


Every Snack You Make, Every Meal You Make, Every Bite You Take, I'll Be Watching You

A dog peaking over the arm of a chair.

But Leave the Fan On If You Poo


Turn Off the Lights!  But Leave the Fan On If You Poo...

Time Flies When You're Throwing Watches


Time Flies When You're Throwing Watches

Just Bought Bike Parts


Just Bought Bike Parts

Let me see if I have enough to eat.

Man counting pennies and stacking them to find money for food.

"Don't tell me what to do!"


There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge with a note, "Don't eat me!"  Now there is an empty plate with a note, "Don't tell me what to do!"

I'm Not the Type of Person You Should Put on Speaker Phone


I'm Not the Type of Person You Should Put on Speaker Phone

Choose Your Love. Love Your Choice.


Choose Your Love.  Love Your Choice.

Always Eat the Ears First


Disney Dinging Tip #1

Always Eat the Ears First

I Nominate All Passengers For the Ice Bucket Challenge


Titanic

I Nominate All Passengers For the Ice Bucket Challenge

Taking Selfies With My Friends Is Like This


Taking Selfies With My Friends Is Like This

you're buying me drinks until you do


If we meet offline and you look nothing like your pics you're buying me drinks until you do.

Monday, August 25, 2014

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Every 60 Seconds In Africa...


Every 60 Seconds In Africa...

...a minute passes.

Stop Chew


Stop Chew

A chewed up bottle of Stop Chew, which is what you put on things to train your dog not to chew on them.  Apparently the dog was not deterred.

Friday, August 22, 2014

Cherry Tomato Stick Snacks


Cherry Tomato Stick Snacks

Ingredients
-Cherry Tomatoes
-Mozzarella Cheese Balls
-Basil Leaves
-Olive Oil
-Vinegar
-Salt and Pepper
-Toothpicks

Directions
-Mix oil and vinegar.
-Drizzle on top of food once on toothpick as desired.
-Sprinkler salt and pepper on food.

Stop! CTRL+V!


Stop!  CTRL+V!

Let's see the last thing you copied.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Like A Boss!


Like A Boss!

Toddler smiling, leaning back in little, fancy tub with a wash cloth on it head and a wash cloth across its groin.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Pulled Up Behind A Hearse At A Stoplight


Pulled Up Behind A Hearse At A Stoplight

A creepy head in the back window of the hearse.

Fishing For Likes


Fishing For Likes

Guy with a fishing pole catching Facebook Likes.

If You Want A Rebel Flag, Nothing Beats The Original


If You Want A Rebel Flag, Nothing Beats The Original

A image of the colonial American flag.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

There's No Place Like Home


There's No Place Like Home

A photo of the Walt Disney and Mickey Mouse statue with the castle in the background.

Senior Citizen Centre


Senior Citizen Centre

A traffic sign attached to a utility pole outside a cemetary.

Amish Stretched Limo


Amish Stretched Limo

A photo that appears to have been Photo Shopped.  It is a horse pulling an extra long Amish buggy.

We Have Camo Wedding Gowns


We Have Camo Wedding Gowns

I'm Into Drumers

I'm Into Drumers

Monday, August 18, 2014

I'm watching my fellow Americans take the same path.


Back when I studied the holocaust in school, I remember thinking, "How did Hitler get over 6 million people to follow along blindly and not fight back?"  Then I realized, I'm watching my fellow Americans take the same path.

The Truth Behind Narwhals


The Truth Behind Narwhals

They have a unicorn inside pedaling and using an air tank to breath.

I Hope This Time The Human Understands My Art


I Hope This Time The Human Understands My Art

Superman Finally Learned to Wear His Underwear on the Inside


Superman Finally Learned to Wear His Underwear on the Inside

Here's to all of you who rearrange the dirty dishes in the dishwasher after someone else has loaded it.


Here's to all of you who rearrange the dirty dishes in the dishwasher after someone else has loaded it.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

This Is Awkward For Me Too


This Is Awkward For Me Too

A beggar on the side of the road with a sign that says, "This is awkward for me too!"

If You Can Dream It, You Can Achieve It


If You Can Dream It, You Can Achieve It

An ice cube arm curling match sticks with Life Savers as weights on the end.  As it works out it looks at a motivational poster of the Titanic sinking.  The caption on the poster reads, "If you can dream it, you can achieve it."

One Man's Trash Is Another Man's Nightmare


One Man's Trash Is Another Man's Nightmare

A white trash bag by the side of the a trash can with a McDonald's Happy Meal with a creepy happy face.

Am I the Only One Who Likes Winter More Than Summer?


Am I the Only One Who Likes Winter More Than Summer?

That Was Zen, This Is Meow


That Was Zen, This Is Meow